Stronger

I was a bit weary to publish this post… I stewed for quite some time before hitting the button.

I’m not one to blast my problems to the world or complain about the imperfections in my life because, to be quite honest, I have been very blessed.  That being said, lately, for whatever reason, I have been seriously stressed about some silly and some-not -so-silly things.

Most of them are things that everyone stresses about; finances, time, friendships, working out, finances, time, cold season…

I’ve also had to watch someone close to me go through a very difficult time. Admittedly, some of their troubles are self-inflicted. But a lot of them are not. It’s really difficult to watch this and not be able to help them. I’ve been praying for them every day. I’ve also been trying to do little things, talking to others, talking to this person, encouraging them… but it’s gotten to the point where there is almost nothing left to do…mostly because they have given up.

Recently, I visited with this person and it absolutely shocked me. I’ve seen them go through phases like this before, but never this bad. It absolutely broke my heart. After spending a few hours with them, I was drained. I usually keep a pretty upbeat attitude but I had a heck of a time doing so while spending time with them. I feel guilty even though I know it’s not my fault.

I’ve had a few personal rough patches over the last ten years and gone through some dark times, but I’ve learned that at the end of the day, you can’t let your problems consume you. Yes, you have to take responsibility for your actions, but you also have to let them go. You have to learn from your mistakes and keep moving on… or you’ll never get up from rock bottom. I’ve also learned, that no one else can do this for you. It’s something you have to want and something you have to work at. Every day.

One of my favorite quotes is this:

 “Pero el secreto de la vida esta en caerse siete veces y levantarse ocho.” 
-Paulo Coehlo

Translation? But the secret of life is falling down seven times and standing up eight.

I also love this quote from Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird:

“I wanted you to see what real courage is… It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what.”

During the worst of times, I still find great comfort in my faith. This does NOT mean that I haven’t been angry with God, it’s easy to blame the All Mighty when things get tough… and holy cow, there have been some times where I have been completely infuriated…but I also realize that He sticks with me…even when I screw up and I would rather hide under my covers than face the world.

There have been times when I’ve wondered if and when things would ever get better… years later, I’d look back and realize that I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be…even though at the time I never thought I’d get through it alive.

One thing that people-including myself- often forget is that, yes, God is fighting in our corner, but you also have to know when to take make a move. He can only do so much.

Anyway…I was still feeling a bit down this morning after my recent visit. I was driving into work and heard this song while flipping through the channels…I realize it’s about a breakup and moving on…so the lyrics don’t necessarily go with this situation. But the main point of the song rings true, What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

In short,  I’ll continue to help them in every way that I can. I’ll continue to pray for them. And I’ll continue to fight my own battles, knowing that I am not alone. Sometimes all we need is a reminder to lift us up and get back on track. I hope this helps that person.

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One Comment on “Stronger”

  1. embamford says:

    I had a friend in exactly the same position a few years ago. It is so difficult and so draining and made me question myself a lot, but now that they’re through it I know they appreciate the fact I was there, even if it didn’t feel like I was helping at all. I know your friend will feel the same way about you.

    Another quote I like to remember in difficult times:
    “Truly to enjoy bodily warmth, some small part of you must be cold, for there is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. nothing exists in itself. if you flatter yourself that you are all over comfortable, and have been so a long time, then you cannot be said to be comfortable any more.”

    Also, remember that the days are growing ever longer…


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