As much as I loved sneaking off to the city for a couple of days with the birthday
boy man, I have to admit, it is nice to be home. It felt so good to put on my super-soft, enormous sweats (They have always been big, but now they are …even bigger!) and a t-shirt and crawl into my own bed.
Don’t get me wrong, NYC was great. We ate and drank and walked and walked and ate and watched and walked all over. But there’s just something about coming home, dumping your stuff in a pile in the middle of the floor and immediately putting on those previously mentioned sweatpants.
Say it with me, “Aaaah…”
Anyway, I know we have a lot of catching up to do. I’m working on a couple of posts…one I am having an especially hard time writing because it’s something very personal…and I am honestly unsure how exactly to approach it. In the end, I’m sure I’ll choose my normal verbal-vomit, dump whatever comes to mind out on the
page screen approach. And that’s fine.
Before I do that, there are a few things I really need to get off my chest.
Allow me to give you a play-by-play of something that happened to me on Saturday.
Prepare for a rant.
1. I love boots. Especially tall boots. I just love them. And how they look.
2. I have big calves and always have. This makes buying and wearing tall boots very difficult. Sometimes impossible. So, you know that when I found a pair at Target last year on clearance for $20 that I had to have them. It was the last pair, and I could actually zip them all the way…okay, most of the way, but it was close enough that I bought them. And wear them often…even though they only zip most of the way.
3. I really love the way jeans look with tall boots. But I hate that I have to stuff them inside my already over-flowing boot leg.
4. That being said, I decided that I needed to find a pair of skinny jeans.
4b. I currently own two pairs of jeans-one that I saved from a few years back and one that I purchased…so I figured it was okay for me to buy a few more pairs. Both pairs are boot-cut, size 8.
5. I’m not a huge fan of skinny jeans. I don’t know why…But I decided that if I want to wear my boots as comfortably as possible, that I should get a pair. Give them a go, if you will.
It’ll also save my boot-cut jeans from getting super wrinkly if I decide to wear a few times between washes…not gonna lie, this happens often.
6. On Saturday, I went to the mall to find an over-the-shoulder bag for our trip and decided that I would also find at least one pair of skinny jeans.
7. Instead of finding a cute pair of skinny jeans, I discovered that my previously mentioned big calves prevent me from being able to wear skinny jeans. Period.
8. This discovery is really depressing. I can’t make this stuff up…and furthermore, who would make this up?!
Seriously, I don’t know if it’s because I’ve gone down so many pants sizes or what, but most of the jeans I tried on I couldn’t even pull up all the way. Apparently if you wear anything below a size 12, you have chicken legs…or something.
I know what you’re thinking, Home Girl is in denial about what size she wears!
For all of you thinking that, I can tell you, every pair of boot-cut jeans I tried on, in the same size fit perfectly. But I wasn’t looking for boot-cut jeans, was I?
So no, it was NOT because they were too small or I couldn’t get them over my hips (which,yes, can happen and I am sure if you’re a bit curvy you can relate-you move up the size chart and move on with your life), but because apparently I have such monstrous calves that I could only get them up to a certain point until they got stuck.
9. Yes, the jeans got stuck on my calves, so much that I couldn’t pull them up all the way, no matter how hard I tried, and then I had to sit down and use both hands to peel them off. Try doing that in every store. Talk about a workout!
10. This initially made me feel like a freak! I had to do this little dance, not once, not twice, but over ten times in ten different stores…with numerous brands of jeans. I even tried going up a couple of sizes in some stores, with the same result! I left the mall empty-handed (well, except for the bag I initially set out to get…which was also a huge disappointment–it broke!) and extremely discouraged. No wonder I can hardly ever find tall boots!
11. Why do clothing companies think that all women are created exactly the same? Why do clothing companies think that all women have tiny non-existent calf muscles?! Why does the “ideal” woman have to fit a certain image or set of measurements?!
12. I’m 5’4″ and a size 8, however I’m also very curvy. And I have short legs. And big calves.
I have big boobs and a big butt…even after losing thirty pounds. I’m not going to give you my measurements, because it really doesn’t matter and I think that would be a little creepy…but I will tell you that even after losing that much weight, my bra size remains the same… my hips and butt are smaller, but they are still very much there. And I am okay with that. So is my husband.
13. I run. Yes, I am a runner. This means that I have big legs. Big thighs and yes,
apparently monstrous big calves. That doesn’t mean that I am “fat,” it means that I have muscle. I admit, I was fat, but that is not the case anymore.
14. Growing up, I always had an issue with my legs. I wouldn’t wear certain things because I didn’t want to accentuate them and I was extremely self conscious–especially as a teenager.
15. Now, as a 25-year-old woman, I am embracing my body. This is what keeps me working to improve myself both physically and mentally. God gave me this body for a reason, but I know that He expects me to take care of it. This is why I work out and aspire to be better.
I know that I have my trouble spots, but I’m not focused on them. I know that I embrace my curves, my muscles, and even those giant calves. I know that I am healthy.
My “big” legs carry me through long runs, giant hills, fast runs, mud and snow, new challenges and every day life and I am so blessed to be able to use them to their maximum capacity. And I will continue to do so as long as I can.
So, I guess this is my way of taking a stand against those in the industry who try to make me conform to a certain size and shape. If you can’t make pants–or any clothing, for that matter–that work with my body, then I won’t wear them. Thanks but no thanks.
I am not a perfect creation, but I am perfectly me.
Just kidding. I mean…it is Friday. But it was a crazy week-it flew by…seriously, where did it go? And why did I not accomplish 3134 of the 4231 items on my list of things to do?!
In other news, I’m pretty proud of myself; I’m down 15 lbs (11 since using mfp) and I’m ALMOST into another pair of pants I haven’t worn in a looooong time. Again, big surprise.
I’m also back to running-after I got that nasty stomache bug a week or so ago, I’ve been bad about pounding the pavement…until this week!
Also, I’m having a minor freakout-I am running a 5k tomorrow! For fun. But I haven’t run a race in a long time! I’m not expecting much time-wise (not yet, anyway!). I’m just hoping to keep my nerves down until I start the race. Gah! Seriously, thinking about this is making my stomach flip-flop and… I think I just started sweating!
Another plus about this weekend? I’m off. So is Ben. We have brisket to smoke, 5ks to run and worlds to conquer! I am pretty excited!
We also signed up to be “Foodie Pen Pals!” For more information, click the badge on my homepage. We find out who our match is tomorrow and I am completely stoked. It’s a really awesome concept and I can’t wait to join in. I love mail…I turn into a kid at Christmas when I get mail…especially packages!
Alright, over and out folks.
Have a great weekend!!!
Today has been a great day…for the most part.
I only hit the snooze button three times this morning.
My husband made me coffee…right after grinding the beans. Yum.
I made it to work on time. And didn’t dump coffee on myself.
I had a jelly donut for breakfast from a local bakery and made out with hardly any powdered sugar on my face/shirt/pants/desk. I also had an awesome lunch date with Ben.
I didn’t break anything…but I did manage to get a big black streak on my shirt while messing with the plotter…
And something else happened that I was a little hesitant to post about… for no other reason than I thought it was silly…
On a whim, I tried on a pair of pants that I haven’t worn in… a while… let’s say, last summer, and even then… they were a little tight…okay, uncomfortably tight. So, I put them on this morning. And guess what? I didn’t have to twist or suck in or do any weird manuevers to put them on–dont judge, I know you know what I am talking about!–They just…fit. And now, here I am, wearing these pants…that didn’t fit…and now they do.
It was a surprise. Needless to say, I’ve got some extra spring in my step today.
Truth: I haven’t actually lost a lot of weight… overall I am down about 12 lbs…8 since really starting to use My Fitness Pal. But, I am starting to see some changes-including a little more toning… and a few other people have noticed. I actually weigh less now than I did when I got married. No big deal.
As good as it feels, I’m not looking for that approval or pat on the back from others. The biggest satisfaction is knowing that I am getting stronger every day. I’m not perfect, but I have definitely made some strides. I’m able to do more and feel good doing it. I don’t huff and puff walking up stairs and I look forward to getting out and being active.
Although I am not in the best running shape-yet!-I have some 5ks lined up in the next few weeks and am ridiculously excited/anxious/nervous/beyond pumped for the Ragnar Relay in September (BTW-if you’re in the Plattsburgh area and want to join our team, hit me up.)! I’m looking forward to pushing myself even further.
I’ve got this, and if I happen to fit into an even smaller pair of pants along the way, that’s totally okay with me.