I’ve had this feeling gnawing at me and haven’t been able to put my finger on what it is. Or how to make it go away.
Allow me to explain.
Every few months something happens. I become filled with dread, frustration and anxiety as I slowly realize that I have taken on too much and live in fear of letting someone down or failing at one of my commitments…
Because I am incredibly stubborn, I’ll let this go on for a few days, weeks, or in this case-over a month…and then comes the hard part–figuring out what needs to be done and what needs to be cut out…and cleaning up the mess that life becomes when you ignore things for too long.
This morning, I reached that point. It took the form of a bag of peaches.
Farmer Ben and I picked up some gorgeous peaches at the farmers’ market this weekend. I’ve been wanting to further my canning experience and decided to make jalapeno peach jam. I was so excited and could not wait to make it.
But then life and my schedule got in the way and three days have passed without a sign of delicious jam-making in sight.
This morning, I did the snooze button tango and decided to grab a peach for breakfast on the go. I opened the bag and the first peach I grabbed was soft….really soft. And brown. I threw it in our compost bucket and tried again. I found a few other peaches were also starting to go but found one that was still good.
I glanced at Ben with a defeated look on my face and he simply said, “we’ve gotta use those up.”
If you know me, you know that I absolutely hate wasting food. It pains me to throw food away. Especially if I haven’t even gotten to try it yet.
So today, it hit me.
There is a peach sitting on my desk, reminding me that I need to take some time and clean up the messes. That I need to let go of something and tackle everything else that is on my plate.
So after trying to go it alone, I am leaving it in God’s hands…lifting everything up to Him and asking for help…